damn sucky!! i am so so so dead can!! so retarded!!
supposed to bring Collin Raye's cd home tonight to burn for sis.. itchy hand me.. played the cd in the shop and guess what!? hell! i only brought the cover home! the disc is still laying on the stupid player!! wtf!

secondly, i wanted to burn a korean compilation for her.. BUT i forgot to bring the disc home too!! darrrnnnn ass!!

*grrr!! so pissed man! and tmr Lizhen will be droppin by my hse to collect the discs in the evening.. sighz!

that is why im still up now.. downloading the songs individually from net.. but got to give up the korean songs lah.. cos i dont know what is nice and where r they from..

talked to sis for abt half n hour today?
i think.. ppl might say, or naturally feel that since she has left for abt 6mths.. we wouldnt miss her that much already.. but i dont agree.

maybe, we no longer feel damn damn sad everyday that she isnt around.. but i still miss her alot.. damn lot.. and times when i miss her, i'll naturally feel sad.

sad that she isnt around.. sad that we only talked approx. once a week.. sad that she cant have family dinner with us.. sad that nobody F me upside down.. LOLX! omg and now i feel like crying while listening to All 4 One - Someone who lives in your heart. lol..

yeah, this sis of mine.. lives in my heart.. not in my mind.. cos .. mind forgets someone so easily.. but in ur heart, she'll always be held there. always.

i..simply.. miss her. :...(

it "sings" my heart out...

"I'll find my way to you wherever you are..
Cause you are in my soul and you have got my heart..
And your love will carry me on ..
If there is one thing in this world I know is true..
It's the love I feel when I am thinking of you..
No ocean, no mountain can keep us apart..
Cause no one can take away someone who lives in your heart..
All out hopes and our dreams are alive..
I will carry it with me through distance and time..
No one in this world can keep us apart..
Cause no one can take away someone who lives in your heart..."

smoke-d @
Thursday, September 27, 2007}

emotions suddenly turned so random.. i'm like.. one moment satisfied, one moment depressed..

read up a few of my past entries.. and suddenly teared.. confused..

realised that i've changed so much.. i think i've grown matured so much over the past few mths. but why am i .. still not satisfied with the present me?
have been pmsing quite oftenly nowadays... like dazing minutes away with whirlwind of thoughts.. mixed feelings.

thinking of.. now...
i really dont know who or what i am being now..

was chatting with Yun on the phone on Sunday night..
asked "is it karma?"....

its just another chapter of life; ups and downs.

smoke-d @
Tuesday, September 25, 2007}

(-_-) stupid menses.. made my night so terrible last night.. whole day only ate 1 meal.. reached home after work around 10++.. went to bed str8 til nw..

was telling junjie.. i cant drink cold drinks cos i wanna "preserve" the menses til wed cos im off then.. but ... being stubborn i stil drank a can of.. F&N grape.. NB! at night happily eating cuttlefish.. then tio! sighz!

end up changin my off day to today.. sian.. lidat ive to work 5days then can take off sia... haiiiiiz!!!

but, i can do alot of things at home today also lah(provided it doesnt cramp "hell-ly" later).. got to burn cds for sis.. Lizhen and Liyi will be going aussie this Sat.. so they are helping to bring it over to her.. hehe..

actually.. i'm kind of hoping to go with them lah.. but... im so poor!! can only afford tiger flight now lolx!

forget it.. next year i'll definitely go! but dad wants to go also lah.. then he cant go during winter.. haiz.. see how lah...

this year is the 1st time im not spending bday with sis.. damn sad... haiz...
but.. at least she gonna make it back in dec.. gonna ask her to treat me a belated dinner!! hehe!!

smoke-d @
Tuesday, September 25, 2007}

omg! i just did a depression screening test online! it says I'm suffering from mild depression!

sia lah..dunno true or not.. lolx.. but mild should be alright right?!

ok this weekend spent was .. fruitful while .... TERRIBLE! went to shin for 2 days str8! friday was okay....with new different company.. Mervyn and Aloysius.. went again yesterday for Jennifer's bday.. wanted to stay for a while only.. in the end we were surrounded by alot of drunkards!!!

nv seen weiwen and andy so drunk b4.. Andy was completely wasted lor... he vomited at his seat! completely unconscious i swear! & weiwen secretly went pasir ris for his friend's chalet though he was so damn drunk.. to the extent like he cant walk at all.. i really cant imagine how he went there.. crawl maybe.. lolx..

in the end, after supper at chong pang's froggie porridge, me and shan still have to go all the way to pasir ris to fetch him back.. shack!!
reached home at 5am.. supposed to work today lor.. but head was sooOO spinning till i cant wake up..

rested at home till 7pm.. met up with Qf, Mervyn and Aloysius for dinner.. went Junction8 for .. pizzas.. the service there so bad sia! nb! the clumsy staff was serving us the pizzas in a non-surrounded pan.. then the whole pizza slide out onto the table! requested to change for a new one.

then the AM came back with the same pizza asking us in a damned attitude like "what the hell is wrong with the pizza?" but it wasnt the way she phrase it to us, but the attitude was! HELLO, our pizza dropped onto ur table which we dont even know if ur table is cleaned or is it stained with the germs or worse still, detergent in ur cloth which u used it to wipe the table!
worse of all, ur staff use his bare naked hands to push all the pieces of pizzas back to the pan!!

but we didnt argue cos Aloysius was rushing time to go for his mahjong session.. but, he did asked for a feedback form.. yet the AM gave him a blank paper, say can write our feedback on it then they will pin up on a board which they use to pin feedbacks wrote by customers.. siao.. like ppl believe.. lolx..

sian sian sian.. work tmr again.. haiz... i think i really need a break.. im losing energy.. .. I WANT A HOLIDAY~~~

smoke-d @
Monday, September 24, 2007}

so rare to blog at this time..! i'm super..hyper today for no reasons..

its not "normal" of me to wake up and on the pc at this time during my off days.. =)

made a cup of coffee(not gd coffee though cos im poor-civilian lolx).. light a cig.. hehe!! im awake!
cigarettes and coffee are the best combination for morning energizer!!

i've been kind of homie recently.. actually everyday's work is damn tiring.. indescribable tiring.. countless things to do.. all new staffs.. the only one who's more pioneer also problematic.. sigh.. and... they are all guys! lolx.. 3 of them though.. but ok lah..heng they didnt "anti" me.. but just that on gossips/chats that i dont agree with them.. i've got no girls backup lolx..

went to Qf hse last night.. nabey! they r always so scared when i go to their hse lor.. cos they scared they will see me sleeping in their room when they wake up for work in the morning hahaha!
cos for once i rmb.. sleepin over cos i chatted with their mum till quite late so she asked me to stay..haha..

yest aunt also suggested that i should stay over.. but dont want lah.. paiseh later she stil buy breakfast for me..hahahaha!! only her mum welcome me lor.. idiotic Qf still tell her mum i wont be going up already.. CB!! lucky her mum called me..
chatted with Qf till.. 12plus i think..

im dying of hunger nw.. where's my breakfast!!! mama still havent come back yet..
heeeheeee.. im going shin tonight! 2 weeks++ didnt go le.. partly also bcuz after i abstracted the tooth.. cant drink for 2 weeks..

smoke-d @
Friday, September 21, 2007}

super sian!! super tired!! super stress!!

and super plain life!! :(

didnt really feel like calling friends up.. neither did i feel like meeting them for the past 1 or 2 weeks? why uh?? siao again..

is this the kind of peaceful life i've always been hoping for? i don't know seriously..
but i do feel quite comfortable staying at home though lolx!!

havent been to anywhere lately.. juz being homie..
met up with Qf and her friend, Mervyn(hope i spell correctly).. wanted to just eat and drink coffee at northpoint Macs'.. wah seh.. now i know how boring singaporeans are!

northpoint sia.. the outsides seats all packed lor!! and pathetic 4 smoking tables.. so we end up goin to the Macs dad used to bring us to, near Sembawang Pri(demolished). sat inside for abt 5mins thinkin what to eat.. but the smell alone..cured my hunger..lolx!! end up ordering nothing n we left!

went to a tim sum cafe next to it.. went inside, idiotic us find the chairs damn uncomfortable. sat less than 3mins, knowing that they feel like leaving so i ran out first! lolx.. so paiseh..
and the last destination was upp thomson.. wanted to eat prata but prata house full house lor.. so we went to another HK cafe nearby..

it was so much better than the one b4.. left around 2am.. then we sat at the void deck of my blk.. chit chatting.. or rather talk cock lah.. haha.. reached home around 3am..

this mth didnt really go shin bar.. but, i still spent alot of money!!!! *grrr
thought this mth can save up abit.. sian..
end up spending $100 bucks on Wed during work.. it was a short shopping break.. i think i took abt 20mins only.. 100 bucks gone sia!!!! =(

went to X-craft.. hehe..to buy the zippo that ive aimed for so long.. after discount, still have to pay 48bucks lor..
then went to Precious Thots with Addy.. cos he bought a super cute debit card lah.. copycat me also followed..haha.. bought 1 for LR also.. haiz.. 25 bucks each after discount also..!!

at night b4 closing shop, i suddenly have cravings for choco.. went to Chocolate World..damn ex lah!! i think it is as ex as Aussie's de chocolate factory leh.. spent $25 on 150grams of choco! 150g!! which is like.. 14 'lil pathetic pieces of choco.. just the size of "ah-da-ji(seed in hok)"!!

1 day spent $125 excluding my meals and transportation.. i reckon this is called madness.. my daily salary also cant cover.. damn sad..

and im finally off tmr!! :D
but i think i just wanna stay at home the whole day cos im tooOO tired.. moreover i havent plan my roster yet..! =(

--- i miss sis chelsea
--- i miss Perth
--- i miss the slow paced life
--- i miss the quietness
--- i miss the weather
--- i miss the kebabs
--- i miss Kai
--- i miss Macs harshbrown + bacon and egg mcmuffin
--- i miss watching bellamory(not sure if its the correct spelling!)
--- i miss smoking while ogling at the starry sky
--- i miss the blazing sun with cold air
--- i miss driving and lookin thru my rear mirror at those damn cool looking guys playing loud rock music
--- i miss the mussels at Fremantle!!
--- i miss playing soccer/basketball outside the garage & killin' all Wendy's plants lolx!!
--- i miss BIG W!!! hahaha!!
--- i miss the KFC chicken

I SIMPLY MISS SIS AND PERTH~~~ :(

smoke-d @
Sunday, September 16, 2007}

y cant i just have a .. peaceful job..
im speechless abt Cecilia quitted the job over a misunderstood sms! regardless of the numerous small talks i've with her.. abt my expectations..abt this job.. she was the one that i was goin to train as a 2nd in-charge! whatever!!

like what Addy says.. rotten apple..keep le also no use.. they already didnt have the heart to continue workin le..no point keeping..
and the always headstrong me.. im not that kind which will keep them.. words like.. "pls stay..im short of manpower pls.." wont ever come out of my mouth.. lolx!

4get it.. been nearly 4yrs..i've encounter this problem soOO many times that i'm becoming so numb to it.

went to the 7th month dinner tonight.. nothing new..been going there since.. forever? Bro black mole and Bro Ah Ku so drunk!! went to their table once then i saw them taking a cup of SUPER thick martell asking me to drink.. so i ran! luckily i reacted fast enuf! heh!

careless me..left my zippo at the table then forget to take.. it was a bday present from my sis..few years back le..but i manage to find it that day when i was tidying the room! haiz.. 4get it..ran back with Charis but it wasnt there already.. :(

gotta work tmr morning..alone.. till yanting comes at 1pm.. sianz!!
and my stupid gum is still bleeding!

---i could feel the warmness in his hands.. so much warmth... but in reality, i realise the warmness doesnt really belong to me....

smoke-d @
Monday, September 10, 2007}

short and simple entry..

i've finally abstract my decayed tooth today.. didnt plan for it but cos of the sudden pain this evening that i decided to remove this pain forever, for good.

plucking it off wasnt that pain, but the anaesthetic jab was so damn pain!! esp the first and 2nd one.. i took 3 injections of that cos the dentist said that the hole in my tooth is too deep so she have to anesthetized my gums to the maximum..

wah song!! cos its already 3hrs and my mouth still feeling numb! high sia~~

but im feeling so uncomfortable now.. cos of the bloody smell in my mouth.. i even hate uncooked meat smell so not to mention my fresh blood...

anyways, gd cum bad experience. gd cos im still young and my bone is soft enough for the doc to pluck it out..(quite easily i guess though a small part of it chipped off).. bad.. cos i guess the pain is abt to come later in the night after the anaesthesia wears off.. hope the painkillers helps later..


Doc: do u want to keep ur tooth? its still in one piece..
Me: (didnt even take a look at it) oh no no.. pls just throw it away.
Doc: so u dont want to keep it? usually ppl keep it if it is stil in a piece..
Me: No NO! its okay.

i walked out of the room walking weakly.. felt as if the numbness went all the way down to my feet! lolx..

bye decayed teeth
bye pain...

smoke-d @
Friday, September 07, 2007}

You Are 20% Weirdo

Your thinking is so in line with the mainstream, it's pretty freaky. Have you ever considered running for political office? You're so normal, people can't help but feel comfortable with you!

smoke-d @
Friday, September 07, 2007}

You Are 44% Good

You are a fairly good person. You strive to live a moral life whenever possible. You are usually kind, generous, and loyal. However, you do have a dark side that even you may not see. When it comes down to ethical decisions, you tend to take the path of least resistance. So you may end up lying, cheating, or engaging in other bad behavior... because it's just easier to do so. You are also probably: Conflicted and confused about the current course of your life Right now you are on track to being: A slightly crooked politician To be a better person: Break one bad habit - whether it's telling white lies or spending too much money.

wah seh!! so damn true sia!!
Break one bad habit - whether it's telling white lies or spending too much money! BINGO!

smoke-d @
Friday, September 07, 2007}

not really in the best of mood to blog.. kind of.. exhausted..recently..

i've always been my own contradiction in my life.

eg; i'm upset, but i dont really know why.
i love my peaceful life, but i find it boring at times.

suddenly, i'd the crave to buy chocolate today.. and chocolate makes someone happy so i guess its a symptom that i aint happy? is that an indication or that im just being over-sensitive?

called sis this evening.. talked for abt half an hr.. it always felt gd talking to her.. gd, but insufficient. gd isnt enuff.. felt like.. im talking to someone so near yet in reality so far away from me.. 3mths and 13days. see ya sis.. (:

thought of a few ironic things abt me.. and wanted to blog it down but.. it all disappear in my mind now..

think im just overly exhausted. ppl tend to be emo esp. when u'r too tired..
but gd news is im off tmr! can sleep till the sun rises till the sun sets! heh! then i'll be "sorrow-free" again!

i simply love off days! esp when i can get to sleep and watch my dramas for as long as i want.

smoke-d @
Friday, September 07, 2007}

wahaha! this is super-duper-hyper-DAMN FUNNY!! we were talking in the living room while watchin soccer abt bribing of football players(me pops n lr). here it goes!

LR: dad, do u know that man city players hor, are all being "bought" thru watching videos of them playing and not by seeing them in real?
they all cant speak english cos they are all from over the world

PR: arent they international players? why cant speak eng?

POPS: oh cos lidat they cant be bribed!(FYI: cos EPL is in England)

so i was doing some actions saying that they wil understand if someone flips the money in their face.. so dad did a super funny act!! like asking ppl if they want to eat.. eg..putting ur fingers into ur mouth!! BCUZ in chinese, its called "eat money"! lolx!!

its so funny lah if u all see the action from him!! any1 interested? i can demo 1 day lolx!!

Leeling's mom is so kind to bring us food today.. 2 big bags of roast pig and chicken.. so me and yanting ate those the whole day w/o rice!! got so sick of it so we stopped eating.. but there's 2 big drumstick which i didnt bear to throw it away...so.... i DA BAO home! heh! (:

updates for the week!

i was off on last thurs..so decided to "groom" myself.. sounds like a dog sia.. kk i went for a haircut and dyed my hair! wanted to dye ash green but stupid andy kept cursing my hair..and suggested that i should just "replenish" the colour.. fine.. save money also since i'm damn broke. BUTTTT.. i stayed at his shop from 2.30pm to 6plus lor!!! *tired

so, fri was shin again.. was kind of boring this time cos the idiot QF emo again.. but ok lah cos me and charis entertained ourselves haha! left kinda early this time and no supper!

SAT, bday celebration for the 2 princess Charis and Qf. at dbl-o..yah dbl-o.. err..not my kind of hangout but..since its bday then alright lah.. wth though! i cant take vodka/tequila lah.. past 12am i felt headache already.. reached home and vomit! cold sweat somemore.. nb.. NO MORE VODKA FOR ME AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD!

work today was kind of tired+busy+tons of bloody customers+drama at HG again..yah AGAIN! JUNXIONG AGAIN! i'd no choice but .. to sack him..

damn stress man.. keep having problematic staffs.. guys..im just salaried few hundred bucks more than u all, pleaseeee..give me a break! if not, i will really need tranquilliser jabs soon!

i really miss those times working with Leeling, Yanting and Ethel..not that Cecilia and Junjie isnt gd enough.. but the 3 girls nv failed to make me smile/laugh when workin with them! :(

i realised i didnt call sis this week.. and realised that ive to call her at least once a week to talk to her.. nabei..she got call home today lor but nv call me on my cell! hahaha! "nan dao"..she forget me liao.. haha.. shall call her tmr!! ;P

anyways...

AN ADVANCE HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO CHARIS AND QINGFEN!!
and pls stop ur leesssbiansss actss at DBL-O! *shucks!

oh not forgetting, the picture of dbl-o night. my top-chartted one. tomorrow i'll post the 2nd and third. super hilarious. i cant stop luffing my lungs out!

must look at this first b4 u guys find the following one hilarious!!

soo natural...bo bian they are ex lovers lah..heh!!


coming up....
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TAA DAAAA!!!


OMG!! farni right!! xin ku ni le, meng teck.. wahahahahahaahahaha!!! hope this brightens up ur day! cos it did for me! lolx!! :D

smoke-d @
Monday, September 03, 2007}